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Oliver Douglas told the man opening the washer door, "You couldn't pay me enough to commute!" He had to look away from the frilly panties. "Why do you think I used to live on Park Avenue?!"Alf answered as he took out the laundry (starting with pair of tennis shoes), "Herh! I thought it was the other way around. If you moved out of Manhattan, Mrs. Douglas would make you move to an estate. You'd pay the same rent, and have the expense of commuting, too. By limo, probably."Despite the threat of seeing the panties, Mr. Douglas looked at the man, "No, Mrs. Douglas could not make me! She spends too much on clothes and other nonsense for me to allow that." Including tennis lessons.Alf was already folding clothes. "Speaking of misers. Do you think what happened to Jack Benny could happen outside of Hollywood?"Confused, Mr. Douglas's asked, "What!??!"Alf said, "You know, men and women becoming women and men?" Oliver Douglas declared, "That's the most ridicu-" He had to stop in mid-scorn when. "We'd better get this water shut off," the teacher said calmly, surprising himself and ignoring his recalcitrant leg and turbulent guts. He took a few steps toward the boy, dragging his foot, watching the gun, surprised it was so big. Three-fifty-seven said his brain, magnum was the word for it. Where did that come from, magnum? Odd word. Champagne? "Somebody might slip. Bell's going to ring."The boy put the muzzle of the pistol in his mouth and backed up to lean against the tiled wall, eyes closed. The teacher took two more steps and held out the open package of paper. "Here, Michael, hold this," he said. "Please."He pushed it against the boy's right forearm, the one holding the gun, and on his thin chest. My damn knee is trying to buckle. He braced his leg against the drinking fountain, still pushing the pack of paper at the boy. Nuisance, stupid leg, always something.The shaken youngster took the gun out of his mouth and grasped the ream of paper with both hands, the weapon.
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